Friday, September 8, 2017

The Gnome-Mobile

Following the hugely successful release of 1964’s Mary Poppins, Walt Disney Productions knew it had to get their pint-sized dynamic duo, Karen Dotrice and Matthew Garber, back into action before puberty snatched away their box office appeal. Deciding to utilize the pair in another fantasy-fueled family romp, screenwriter Ellis Kadison and director Robert Stevenson (one of Disney's most dependable) loaded their upcoming film with elements from several of the studio’s past successes: a bit of Darby O’Gill magic, a Shaggy Dog car chase, some villainous Thomasina circus-folk, a dash of Summer Magic pastoral, maybe with loveable ol' Walter Brennan from Those Calloways thrown in (for warmth) and a sprinkling of That Darn Cat’s Richard Deacon (for stability.) Heck, why not dollop some Sherman Brothers in, just for the hell of it? Unfortunately, the resulting film - 1967’s The Gnome-Mobile - ended up being far less than the sum of it’s parts.


Based on a 1936 book by Upton Sinclair (yes, that Upton Sinclair,) the film tells the story of wealthy San Francisco-based lumber tycoon DJ Mulrooney (Brennan) and his visiting grandchildren, Elizabeth and Rodney (Dotrice and Garber, respectively) - who are English, obviously. Whilst picnicking in Redwood National Park,  the trio encounter a foot-tall Gnome named Jasper (Tom Lowell) and his irascible old grandpa, Knobby (Brennan yet again, sans dentures,) who are the last Gnomes in this particular forest thanks to Mulrooney’s logging company (natch.) To appease both his guilty conscience and his pleading grandkids, Mulrooney agrees to shuttle the pair of lonesome Gnomes to find more of their kind (and, most importantly, a bride for the young Jasper) in his customized 1930 Rolls-Royce - which the children thereafter refer to as the “Gnome-Mobile.” Hijinks soon ensue, as the Gnomes are spotted and captured by an unscrupulous freak show proprietor, Horatio Quaxton (played by Sean McClory,) and Mulrooney is locked away in an asylum by his doubtful right-hand man, Ralph Yarby (Deacon.)

Didja' ever hear the one about the 12-inch pianist?

Let me come right out and state that, despite going into this film with fairly low expectations (at the end of my Mary Poppins review, I referred to it as a “silly little movie” despite never having seen it - shame on me,) I was still pretty disappointed. While I wasn’t expecting a grand film like Poppins, a small part of me was hoping that the movie about “Gnomes in a car” would at least be a bit eccentric. Alas, beyond the fact that the Gnomes are presented as itty-bitty hillbillies (and briefly confab with some extremely fake-looking animals,) the film plays out in a very pedestrian manner, with few surprises along the way. The obvious bellwether for this film is 1959’s Darby O’Gill And The Little People, Disney’s previous foray into “wee-folk faerie stories“ - and when held up to that film, The Gnome-Mobile pales considerably. Not only is the story much less engaging than Darby’s, but the special effects are somehow less convincing - despite the fact that this film was made nearly a decade later. Perhaps a victim of the studio’s increased film output, the rotoscope and back-projection work here is serviceable, but far less believable than in Disney’s Saint Patrick's Day favorite.

Wow! An actually real totally not-fake Gnome!

To briefly touch upon the music, fans of the Sherman Brothers are not going to be happy with me (again.) Perhaps exacerbated by the fact that I watched this one right after Poppins (which contained the duo’s greatest work by far,) I found the songs written for this movie just awful. Hell, I shouldn’t even say "songs," since really there is one melody (identified as “The Gnome-Mobile Song” in the credits - how original) repeated a few times, with slightly altered lyrics; most of which consist of repeating the title over and over again (“In the Gnome-Mobile, the Gnome-Mobile, ridin’ around in the Gnome-Mobile…”, repeat endlessly.) To be fair, though, I may be damning the Shermans unfairly here, since their songs aren't helped by the fact that they're performed by the characters while they travel in the titular car. Already mediocre songs become sapped of any potential life when every musical number consists of an old man and two kids sitting in a car, singing their hearts out while staring at the windshield.

Time for rehearsals - to the Gnome-Mobile!

On the other hand, the score by Disney stalwart Buddy Baker (composer for Summer Magic and Rascal, among many others) is nothing but wonderful. The scenes set amid the California redwoods are enhanced by a mysterious musical passage featuring low strings, reminding one of the well-known “Aquarium” movement of Camille Saint-SaĆ«ns’ Le Carnaval des Animaux. Baker’s music goes a long way in setting the mood for these forest-set scenes, since once again the filmmakers made the bewildering decision to mix fantastic location footage with obvious studio-bound sets. One moment we have Karen Dotrice walking amongst the beautiful redwoods, the camera catching rays of sunlight breaking through the misty air, and then suddenly we cut to the actress passing a fake log, in front of a big flat backdrop overly-illuminated by bright arch lights. I can understand the need to film shots involving the Gnomes in a studio environment (to better accommodate the special effects,) but was there a real need to shoot Matthew Garber rummaging through a picnic basket on a set? Especially when the real actors (not stand-in’s) have already been shot on-location anyway? It’s an ongoing issue with Disney’s canon, and it continues to boggle the mind.

The cast following the first script read-through...

Not to be a complete downer, there is still much to like in the film. The performances are all fine, with Brennan providing a solid lead that brings enough believability to help carry the concept. His slightly unhinged take on the Knobby character, however, veers precariously from irascible to outright annoying in many scenes. Once the wizened old Gnome learns that his human chauffeur is the very man who owns the logging company responsible for the loss of his beloved trees, he spends the better part of the next twenty minutes of screentime ranting and howling angrily, basically giving he and his grandson's presence away to the human world and drawing the attention of the villainous Quaxton.

Garber channels Damien...

Dotrice and Garber (“The Mary Poppins Kids,” as they’re actually credited in the movie) continue to demonstrate their unique chemistry in this, their last performance for Walt Disney Productions. I have to admit that I was slightly shocked at how much the pair had grown in the few years since Mary Poppins. The two are still recognizably kids, but no longer the squeaky-voiced youngsters from previous films. This does have the unfortunate side-effect of making Dotrice’s pair of dramatic scenes, which were her greatest strengths in Thomasina and Poppins, come off a bit less believably. That, or the actress just couldn’t throw herself into the insipid scripted material given to her this time around. Garber, meanwhile, seems to have taken his youthful wise-ass routine up a notch, his character typically being somewhat detached from the central action in each scene before capping it off with a sarcastic quip.

Not-so-Mad Men

Brennan’s future Family Band cohort, Richard Deacon, is here playing the same character he plays in everything he’s in - which is not necessarily a bad thing. It seems that whenever Disney (or any contemporary casting director, really) needed a starched-shirt, middle-manager type of character, they had Deacon on speed-dial. His nondescript businessman persona actually works in the film’s favor, as his eventual turn to de facto antagonist (sending business-partner Mulrooney to an asylum and taking control of the company) comes as a surprise in a film otherwise devoid of shock. Once we’re into the wacky car chase that precedes the film’s climax (in which Deacon’s car incrementally falls apart around him - amusingly scored to a peppy jazz number by Baker,) his growing befuddlement becomes a joy to watch. Clearly, this character didn’t realize he was in a wacky comedy until the very end.

I once knew a Gnome with a woolly beard named Smith...

Once we reach the aforementioned climax, only then does the film start to offer up a bit of hoped-for strangeness - though it comes about in a sadly regrettable sequence. Arriving at their wooded destination, Knobby and Jasper are welcomed by a thriving colony of little people, led by a “Gnome-king” named Rufus (played by a predictable silly Ed Wynn, in the last of his eight roles for Disney.) Once he’s identified as an “eligible Gnome,” Rufus calls for all the young female Gnomes to display themselves for him (“Line up, girls!” he cries, in an especially teeth-clenching moment,) as he goes down the line naming off each one. Jasper is then informed, however, that <gasp!> the prospective bride chooses the groom (or, as Rufus puts it - in the sole moment that made me crack up - “It’s not the male that picks his mate, it’s the she-male that picks the date!”) Jasper is soon doused in soap bubbles and becomes the prize in a “greased-pig” style contest, with the colony’s bevy of attractive young females all fighting over him. Audiences are thus treated to a series of “something for the Dads” shots of little Gnome women in multicolored mini-dresses swinging on vines, jumping over one another and dog-piling atop the hapless young man. The slippery Jasper, meanwhile, continually finds himself flying around inside a giant soap-bubble, which he attempts to steer toward a shy lady-Gnome that's struck his fancy, played by Cami Sebring (who's named Violet, naturally ... as in "shrinking violet" ... geddit?) Our trio of human leads, meanwhile, are left to stand nearby and pull the occasional “well golly, look at that” face as this climax plays out without their involvement. Besides the fact that this bit of eccentricity comes off as too little, too late to inject any life into the film, the played-for-laughs sexism on display here is honestly rather appalling. This fictional mating ritual isn’t really a “woman chooses the man” situation, so much as an “interchangeable women fight over a man” one; or, more bluntly, a “Disney does foam wrestling” one. I came out of the film in disbelief of what I’d just seen, and unfortunately not in the goofy manner I was expecting.

Character selection screen from "Dead Or Alive: Gnome Tournament Edition"

The Gnome-Mobile had potential to be quite a memorable entry in Disney’s live action line-up, but sadly falls short in most of its attempts to emulate their past successes. Much of the humor falls flat (and is occasionally offensive,) the story is lifelessly pedestrian, and the attempts at charm largely misfire. Sadly, the film would be Ed Wynn’s last, as the legendary comedic actor passed away from throat cancer a year before it’s release. Walt Disney, just six months from his own passing, served as one of Wynn’s casket bearers. This movie would also be the last acting role for young Matthew Garber, whose entire body of work consists of the three films reviewed here. A decade following The Gnome-Mobile’s release, Garber contracted hepatitis from bad meat while traveling through India with his family. By the time they returned to England, the disease had affected his pancreas. Garber passed away on June 13th, 1977, aged 21 years. Karen Dotrice, meanwhile, went on to a steady acting career throughout the 1970s, mostly on British television, and has made the occasional film and TV appearance since then. She and Garber did not keep in touch following their time together, a fact that Dotrice later lamented. In an interview found on the 2004 DVD release of Mary Poppins, she stated:
I remember his mum, Margo, calling to let us know that Matthew had died. That was so unexpected ... I wished I had picked up the phone over the years, I wished I had treated him more like a brother. But he's indelibly printed in all of our minds. He's eternal ... an amazing little soul.

While The Gnome-Mobile may serve as a less-than-perfect note for these talented actors to go out on, their contributions to the field of entertainment will always live on, thanks in no small part to the indelible impressions they’ve left on children around the world during their time at Disney.


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